SysAdmin Jokes that are both funny and cheesy
One of the best parts about working in the computer networking space amongst many funny IT professionals and MSPs is the amazing sense of humor shared by many. We all like to have a good laugh out loud from time to time, so with that here are some of the funniest and cheesiest SysAdmin jokes we could dig up for you.
We’d love to add more to this list too! So don’t hesitate to let us know on Twitter if you have a funny or cheesy SysAdmin joke to share with us.
19 Funny SysAdmin Jokes
It’s always DNS
I was trying to fix a problem with my DNS. But I couldn’t come to a resolution
Due to COVID19, all TCP applications are being converted to UDP to avoid handshakes.
Source: Domotz Dev Team
The ARP Protocol
What does a networking seal say? Arp! Arp! Arp!
A programmer is going to the store. His wife says “get a loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.” The guy comes back with 12 loaves of bread. His wife says “why did you get so much bread?” He says, “they had eggs.”
Bit Torrents like to Share
Bit Torrent packet goes to a bar and asks for a beer. Everyone in the bar who has beer gives him a sip :D
A big MAC address
The SysAdmin was a bit down on his luck and had to take a second job working at McDonalds.
The first customer comes up and says he wants a Big Mac. The sysadmin shrugs and writes something down then hands it to the customer.
A UDP Joke
I’d tell you a joke about UDP, but you probably wouldn’t get it.
A TCP Joke
I was telling my workmates a TCP joke the other day; I had to keep repeating it slower and slower until they got it.
A TCP Packet at the Bar
A TCP packet walks into a bar and says, “I’d like a beer.” The bartender replies, “You want a beer?” The TCP packet replies, “Yes, I’d like a beer.”
Repeat, Repeat, Repeat
Would you like to hear a UDP joke? You like to hear a UDP joke? Would you like to hear a UDP joke? Would you like to hear a UDP joke? I’d tell you a UDP joke, but I’m worried you won’t get it.
Knock Knock, it’s DoS!
“Knock Knock! “Who’s there?”
“A DoS attack.”
“A DoS atta..”
“Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock…”
IPv4’s get exhausted quickly
An IPv4 address walks into a bar and says “Bartender, I need a strong CIDR, I’m exhausted.”
All SysAdmins go to the Cloud
Where do sysadmins go when they die? To the cloud
SysAdmins and Drinks
What kind of beer does a sysadmin like to drink? Root Beer!
SysAdmins do Everything, don’t they?
How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None! That’s a hardware problem.
SQL Queries and Tables
An SQL query walks into a bar. He spots two tables in the corner, so he walks over and says “Mind if I join you?
When Testing in Live Environments
Everybody has a testing environment. Some people are lucky enough enough to have a totally separate environment to run production in.
Three relational databases walk into a NoSQL bar. They left after 5 mins because they couldn’t find a table!
Construction Crews always Causing Problems
A network admin gets stuck on a deserted island with a spade, granola bar, and single piece of fiber. He laughs, eats the granola bar, and buries the fiber. 24 hours later a construction crew came to dig it up, and he was saved.
Give us your Best SysAdmin Jokes
We hope you enjoyed those SysAdmin Jokes and at least a few of them made you laugh out loud! We’d love to keep expanding and working on this list with even more funny SysAdmin jokes. If you have any funny SysAdmin jokes to add to this list, just write to us on Twitter or at email@example.com and we’ll be sure to add your joke and attribute it to you too.
Learn more about SNMP polling and thresholds, SNMP v2 vs v3, what is SNMP, how to find your OIDs for monitoring and more.